There are lots of self help books out there, thousands of them in fact. Some of them are very long, and some of them are very complicated. The aim of all of them is the same, to help people to be happy.
I believe it doesn’t have to be long winded or complicated, people want it to be complicated, because then they can feel special: “Oh I’m such a complicated case, my issues are sooooo complicated and specific, I really must wallow in them and allow myself to be defined by them so that I can feel special and important and different to everybody else!”.
Of course I’m being flippant here and I don’t want to be dismissive of the fact that there are people out there who have experienced terrible things that have damaged them in really awful ways.
But even for them, and everybody else, here are my 3 top tips for being happy.
1: Stop wanting stuff.
Stop wanting stuff you don’t have or wanting stuff to be different. Accepting what you have and accepting how things are is the first step to allowing them to change.
2: Choose to be happy.
Instead of saying “I am not happy”, say “At this moment, I am choosing not to be happy”, even if you just say it in your head. Notice how you begin to think about it differently.
3: Be mindful.
Learn some mindfulness exercises, stop analysing things, stop doing things, start being.
In fact stop reading this, stop thinking this will change things. Just stop. Breathe. Feel the air flowing in and out of your body. Now, choose to be happy about the fact that you are breathing.